I don’t preach what I don’t practice

The world is a scary place and it is even more terrifying when you have to face it alone (via Desperate Housewives).

Earlier this morning I thought to myself, I will make an entry about whatever’s going to be the homily gospel for today. To be honest, my relationship with God has been fluctuating ever since I came here. When I was a kid, it is very unforgivable to miss even one Sunday Mass with the family and I never actually did until College days when I live by myself and all my University schedule became so demanding. But then I learned to adjust and I even went to church every freaking day.

When I moved here though, I passed many Sundays without going to church and sometimes I even forget to pray. I AM NOT PROUD OF THIS but I felt like I needed to admit it to myself that I grew distant to God because I have been denying it for some time now. To justify myself my favorite excuse was that I was busy and that work and school were demanding. But when you come to think of it, whenever you love, you make time. I am no preacher here, but if I say that I love God, maybe this would be the perfect time that I start making time for Him.

So whatever happened to the entry about the gospel? I figure I don’t want to preach when I have a problem myself. I need to accept it then fix it and move on. Part of me always asks God why did you ever put me in this situation, everything was fine back home and then I asked Him why do you send us here. My feelings for staying here, up to now, are mixed. I have so many questions in my head that sometimes I feel crazy just thinking about them. God has the answers but I don’t think I wanted to search more. Rather I wanted to be thankful, because I have so many things to be happy about.

I have a good family and an excellent support system. I can say that I would never ever run out of someone to talk to if anything.

I have my aunts who might be busy with their own families but still make time to spend with us.

My uncles who help my dad cope up with work load here in Canada and all the necessary things he needs to know.

My cousins who teach us the Canadians ways (that is, WWCDWhat Would Canadians Do).

My Uni friends who never let me missed a good party and all the things we need to experience at Uni, after all I am too young not to party and have fun.

My College friends who show me every time I post something online that they still care. They make me feel that I am very welcome to come home and that we are still part of each others’ lives.

Janina Mae and J, my closest cousins, it means so much to me when we comment on each others’ status and it’s like we only live in the same neighborhood.

My high school friends, I never really appreciated high school until I got here. I wish we had bonded more before I left but thank you for accepting me for me, the barbaric side of me, that is.

E, you don’t know how thankful I am because you are still around, you always say you are lucky to have me, I guess it’s the other way around.

“I could go on and on but there’s too much to be thankful for. If these people make time for me because they love me and I make time for them because I love them back, I know the same applies to Him. He is a forgiving God and I know nothing is too late for Him. I do not have to face the world alone.”

4 thoughts on “I don’t preach what I don’t practice

  1. This is very inspiring, Ericka. 🙂 What Would Canadians Do?

    You may be tired of hearing this, but I know for sure that with your wit and talent, everything will turn out okay. :>

    It’s either you come home, or you wait for us to visit you there in Canada. Hahahaha! That would be a long wait, though. 🙂

  2. Great, great post. One of the best I’ve read in a long while on WP. You gott’a remember though that we’re all human, and no one is perfect. The fact that you recognize that makes you a special person to start off with. I agree with Sam, great way to start off Nov with a post like this.

    Keep up the great work! 🙂

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